Things I Like

In no particular order:
1. Naps
2. Air conditioning
3. Mini twix (obviously)

Royal Dork

Is anyone else super excited about the royal wedding? I'm super excited and my friends are making fun of me for it.

I had grand dreams of a royal wedding slumber party where my girlfriends would come over and we'd eat fancy British food like crumpets and cucumber sandwiches and stay up all night watching the wedding coverage. Sadly, all my friends have to work on Friday and they all think the wedding is lame so I'll be partying all by my lonesome. I have my DVR set up to record 12.5 hours of BBCAmerica on Friday. So that's what I'm doing on Friday.

I think it's going to be epic, but I am kind of sick of people referring to it as the "wedding of the century". In thirty years, Williams and Kate's kid is going to get married and I'm sure that's going to be the "wedding of the century" too, just like Charles and Diana's wedding was the "wedding of the century" thirty years ago.

Happy Easter

Easter is my favorite holiday and I think this was my best one yet.

I Want Her Outfit...

...and her dance moves.

Practical Ways to Be Supportive

Don't you love it when you stumble upon something at just the right time? After posting about some of the hard times we're going through, I found this, which describes the ways this woman is supporting her husband during difficult economic times. While not everything that works for her family would work for my family, it got me thinking about the specific things I can do to support my partner.

1) As I mentioned before, am doing more of the housework. Housework is a contentious issue for a lot of couples, and it was one of the biggest issues Chuk and I had when we first moved in together. Here's my two cents on all of it: Chores are the rent we pay to be in a family. Living with others is work and everybody needs to contribute to that work. That being said, what is equitable isn't always what's equal. When I'm not working (which is most of the time) I do most of the housework. However, now that Chuk is putting in 110% at work, I'm willing to put in 100% at home. It's not equal, but I think it's fair.

2) I make his lunch. This has definitely made it easier for him to get out of the house earlier.

3) I remind him to go to bed early.

4) I project positivity. You know the sayings "happy wife, happy life" and "If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy"? In a manner of speaking, I find this to be true. Because my spouse is such an easy-going guy, I've noticed his emotions tend to shadow mine. If I'm melancholy or cranky, he's likely going to be acting kind of down too. If I'm happy and outgoing, he's usually all smiles. I'm not being fake, but I am being optimistic and enthusiastic and I've noticed Chuk's mood has improved as a result.

5) Lots of hugs and kisses.

6) I keep telling him how much I appreciate what he's doing. I'm also spreading the
"I love yous" around pretty generously.

7) I create fun. Silly songs and dances? Check. (The song below is a particular favorite of mine lately.) Funny TV shows? Check. Playing games? Check. Get togethers with friends? Check. Laughter is a stress buster.


8) I've been treating him to some of his favorites. Chuk used to drink two liters of soda a day until I made him cut way back. Now, I'm buying soda a little more frequently, as well as some other little "luxuries" I know he likes that I normally don't get like frozen pizza and junky snacks.

9) I'm giving him space. Usually, I like to spend lots of time with him, but now I'm not saying anything if he wants to spend alone time tinkering with his bike or watching CSPAN. And, I'm watching hockey games with him even though I don't really like them.

10) I've got nothing. I just thought it would be lame if I ended with only nine things.

The Big Talk About Grown Up Decisions

Isn't my niece the cutest? I just want to gobble her up.

Chuk had a bad day at work which was the catalyst for a "come to Jesus" talk tonight. Long story short, his job is in danger. This is hugely problematic since he is our only wage earner. Besides the financial strain, he's feeling extra stressed because he has to be perfect at work. Even one little mistake could result in termination.

I don't know what your partner is like, but mine doesn't like to talk about his problems. However, we've found that when we are both open to talking about what we're going through it brings us closer together. I work hard to encourage him to talk about what's going on by being persistent, asking open ended questions, helping him to verbalize emotions, and being sympathetic. Even though this process can sometimes be exasperating for me, the emotional intimacy is totally worth it. If your partner isn't forthcoming, it really is a worthwhile skill to work on together. I'll get off my soapbox now.

We made a "worst case scenario" plan in case he does lose his job and that helped us both feel a lot more secure. At this point, the WCS plan is for Chuk to move to a smaller apartment, go to grad school in the fall (as planned) and work at a part-time retail job, while I would get a job teaching English in Korea and send remittances home. Yes, this plan would suck because we'd be apart, but it would only be for two years. Besides, people all over the world do this type of thing everyday, so I'm sure we could manage it too.

The non-worst case scenario plan is for Chuk to bust his butt at work for the next two months, or so, to remind everyone how indispensable he is. He will mind all his Ps and Qs, put in longer hours, take lunch breaks outside his office so his "off the clock" time isn't confused with slacking, and he will not use the internet for any personal reason at all. I will pick up more slack at home so he can go to bed earlier and make him lunch everyday so he can be early to work. Additionally, I will stop looking for permanent work (not that I was looking all that hard before) and instead try to start working with another temp agency since I have not been getting very many assignments anymore. We will use any money I make to bolster the emergency fund...which thankfully, we do have.

The reason I won't be looking for permanent work is because we are OFFICIALLY trying to have a baby now. (I likely wouldn't make enough money to cover the exorbitant cost of child care in this area and, no judgement, we agree that we would prefer a parent stay home with any child(ren) we may have. It doesn't really make sense for me to get a job only to have to quit after a few months.) We even looked at ovulation charts and I made an inspiration board for how to convert our guest room/office to a baby room/office. At this point, the plan is for me to temp before and into my pregnancy, and then try and babysit another child once our baby is a few months old and I've gotten into the swing of things, to contribute to our income.

So there you have it internet, we're talking about job loss, big moves, future careers, babies, and money. We made a big life plan and a big life contingency plan. I'm feeling very adult.

Are You Freaking Kidding Me: Internet Edition

I've been having some major internet connectivity issues for the last week. Four calls to Comcast and a home visit later, I think we've narrowed the problem down to needing a new modem. In the meantime, I'm still without internet acccess the vast majority of the time. I'm using my neighbors' wifi connection now; with their permission, of course. Hopefully we'll be able to get our tech issues resolved soon and I'll be back to more regular posting soon.

Anyone else have a love/hate relationship with technology?