Monday, October 4, 2010

My Hair (and Other Deep Thoughts)

My hair has been doing this weird thing lately whenever I put it in a ponytail. It kind of bugs me, but not enough to start actually styling it rather than just throwing it into a messy ponytail. Also, even though ponytails have been my default “do” for 30 years, they have recently started to give me headaches. Does this happen to anyone else?

In other important hair news, I’ve finally decided to acknowledge that my hair looks about a thousand times better when I blow dry it rather than let it air dry. But, oh it feels like such a hassle to blow dry it! I really must be the laziest person on earth.

Deciding whether or not to blow dry brings up a larger issue that I struggle with though. Should I put time, energy and effort into my appearance knowing that it reflects upon how other perceive me, or should I put more time, energy and effort into other endeavors because I believe that it’s what’s on the inside that counts.

As I’m getting older there seems to be less and less middle ground to this question. I want to look nice, but not really enough to work at it. This is a slippery slope because as I get older, it takes more work to look good.

I feel okay about aging; in fact, I’m probably more comfortable with it now than I ever have been, but I have also noticed that I’m getting to the age where people are making more assumptions about me on the basis of how I look, and I’m not okay with that. I still want to be perceived as competent, pulled-together, responsible, and, if I’m being 100% honest, attractive.

It’s difficult to admit that in reality, my life and lifestyle have changed. I am no longer a rising young professional, dating and going out on the town. I am a chronically under-employed wife whose husband prefers me to look “relaxed”.

I don’t have resolution to any of these thoughts. I just wish concealer wouldn’t cake into the wrinkles under my eyes and that my hair wasn’t so frizzy all the darn time.


  1. Yeah I have stopped blow drying my hair, I just don't have time. I actually need to buy a new blow dryer because mine doesn't blow hot enough air to dry it fast enough. I used the blow dryer at the hotel I just stayed at and it worked fabulously (haha).
    So I guess my issue is that I'm too cheap and lazy to buy a decent hair dryer.

    My boyfriend says that he like my relaxed look too. He likes me in jeans, he likes my hair curly (ewww) and with no makeup. bleck But I guess it's flattering that he thinks I'm beautiful without all the extra stuff.

  2. I know you how feel. It's hard to get up a bit earlier in order to get everything taken care of and feel put together. But I know that it doesn't take THAT long and it makes a difference in the way I feel during the day.

  3. I am no longer a rising young professional, dating and going out on the town. I am a chronically under-employed wife whose husband prefers me to look “relaxed”.

    Yep, that's where I am, too. Plus, I moved to Europe, where my large collection of American sportswear does not look stylish. Putting out the effort does make me feel much better about myself, though.

  4. it's healthier to air dry it, i'm doing it too. and your head sometimes hurt if you tie it too strong. maybe try loose ponytail while at home?
    and i like that weird girly moment on your hair today :)

  5. For me, washing my hair with vinegar has drastically reduced frizz and weird poking-up locks.

    I like having my hair out of my face, but I don't like the look of a ponytail or the cold ears, and I sometimes get those headaches. What I usually do is French-braid just the front part of my hair, going straight back from the center of my forehead. I stop gathering in hair from the sides when I get to just in front of my ears. Then I continue braiding without adding hair until a few inches from the ends. If braided wet, it stays done for two days and looks nice. It did take me some practice to get good enough at braiding to do this reliably.


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